At our Thanksgiving dinner table we took turns naming what we are grateful for. I surprised myself a little bit by how emotional I felt when I related that I am grateful to be living in Maine. While I have lived in grand and exciting landscapes all over the country, this is the place where I have chosen to raise my children, this is the place where each day I feel that I receive the goodness of humankind, and can be open and flexible rather than wary and on-guard. This is home. The 20-something city girl that I was for so long still recoils in shock every time I get into a long conversation with a stranger in a grocery line, or hand my debit card to the receptionist at the doctor's office and walk away, or allow my children to run free at our favorite beach, but the woman I am now rejoices that there is this place of relative safety and freedom where you can count on people to be good-hearted, under most circumstances, most of the time.
The one complaint I hear from people who, like me, love raising ourselves and our families in Maine, is that there is a lack of diversity. I am fully aware that there is a lack of ethnic diversity in the towns in which I spend the majority of my time, and that it is all too easy for most of the people I encounter during this holiday season to say, with all good intentions, "Merry Christmas", assuming that that is, indeed, the holiday I will be celebrating. The deeper truth of December is that there are a multitude of cultural and religious celebrations at hand, an incredible diversity of beliefs, purposes, rites and rituals that human beings will celebrate this month, both in Maine, and around the world. As Unitarian Universalists, we can hold in our intentions, and include in our conversations, the celebrations of Luut'aa, Masa'il, Sharaf, Hanukkah, Yule, Maunajiyaras, Tohji-taisai, the death of Zarathustra, and Kwanzaa, as well as Christmas. Becoming educated about the many holy days people experience in December makes our lives richer, and extends a warmer welcome to friends and strangers alike. Being willing to ask "What are you and your family celebrating this holiday season?" and listening to the answer, makes us true interfaith ambassadors, even if, in most of the towns we spend most of our time in, the answer will be full of Christmas plans and good cheer.
Which leads us to another kind of diversity - the diversity, and even divisions, within extended families who gather together in December. For many of us this is a time to see friends and family we haven't seen for months, or perhaps all year. We are excited about the visits, full of plans and fun and laughter. For many of us there will also be difficult emotional situations to navigate when our larger tribe gets together - old hurts can surface, or the usual tensions simply simmer, making us feel stressed and small rather than warmed and loved. Be generous with yourself, and you will be able to be generous with others, even those who push all your buttons, and all at once. Remind yourself before each gathering that you are beloved, faithful, caring and good, and that no matter how challenging others might be, they are struggling to do their best, overcome their own fears, feel that they have enough in the world. Driven by motivations you may not understand, they are still vulnerable human beings, seeking safety. From this place of generosity you can be compassionate toward everyone, while getting your own needs met. I wish you and yours all the love, warmth, laughter, wonder-filled sights, and sweet smells of the season. And, I look forward to hearing what you are celebrating in the fullness of December.
Many blessings,
Rev Jennifer
